*sniff*

One hasn't been feeling quite up to par today. The slaves have been paying scant regard to my commands, and I fear it has upset the royal stomach.

Male slave has been acting strangely. He left his quarters at an early hour, exchanged some sickening affection with the female slave due to his new-but-old duties - whatever they are, they are not more important than me.

He has acted strangely since then, wearing strange apparatus on his head and making noises that would make a hardened kitty blush.

The female one has been carrying out culinary duties, but she failed to make anything for me, nor would she permit my access to the kitchen. It isn't dignified for a queen to go beneath stairs, but surely one has a right to add kitty hair wherever one pleases?

Anyway, after a harrowing half-hour upright, I retired to the royal sleeping quarters for a well earned nap.

But not after relieving my upset stomach on the slaves' bed first. They need to know that I accept nothing less than perfection.

Aah, that feels SO much better.